Mature Jokes

Anyone who`s ever been to a "teaching hospital" knows to expect a group of students to descend upon them at any time. At one such hospital, in the recovery room, a bunch of students gathered around a beautiful blonde...

My mother-in-law visited me and my wife but coincidentally, that day my wife was feeling horny and she did not want to whisper to me since I was busy sharing stories with her mother. My wife tricked me by pretending...

A ninety-year-old man stopped in his favorite bar, sat at the end, and ordered a drink. He noticed a svelte seventy-year-old woman at the other end of the bar, and told the bartender to buy the lovely young lady a drink...

The teacher asked the class to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad`s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, "That was good, but...

The telephone lineman had been out drinking the night before, and the next day he went to work not feeling too good. He climbed to the top of the first pole and as he took his pliers out to repair the wire...

Joe went to a party the other night and was having a real blast. After he`d been there a few hours, and more than just several drinks, he noticed this fabulous blonde standing over to the side. She was in her early to mid...

Once upon a time there was a 90-year old woman whose billionaire husband died. The woman had inherited all of her deceased husband`s fortune and decided she would see if she could remarry herself a fine young man...

Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their sex lives. Karen said, "I call my husband the dentist because nobody can drill like he does."
Joanne giggled and confessed...

A man walks into the Election office in Leeds and says to the Receptionist, "I would like to put my name forward for the forthcoming elections to be an independent candidate."
Receptionist, "Certainly sir, no problem...

On his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate was for consultation with an Indian medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a simple cure for erectile dysfunction...