Mature Jokes

Mrs. Johnson, the elementary school math teacher, was having children do problems on the blackboard that day. "Who would like to do the first problem, addition?"
No one raised their hand. She called on...

A man walks into a bar and sees a hot gorgeous woman. He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there, good lookin`. How`s it goin` ?"
Having already downed a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him...

A mom of an 8-year-old boy was awaiting her son`s arrival from school. As he ran in, he said he needed to talk to her about making babies. He claimed he knew about the development of a fetus but didn`t understand...

A 19 year old lad has been dating a 17 year old girl for a few months. They`ve been to the pictures and return to her home where she lives with her father, mother having passed on several years previously. They settle down to..

A young couple were on their honeymoon and were staying at a hotel with a large swimming pool. They decided to go for a swim, and the bride donned a new bikini that she had recently purchased. As she swam...

I had a friend who during his vacation to Thailand, ordered a massage session in his room, one for his wife and one for him. After massaging the man for a long time, the Thai girl said, "Massage...

A young under-educated man applied for a job in an office as a custodian. He filled out the application, then went in for an interview with the woman in charge of Personnel when his name was called. After the interview...

One night this guy and his girlfriend were about to go into his apartment and before he could open his door his girlfriend said, "Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door...

A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotch-less panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband...

A Doctor recently had a patient "drop" in on him for an unscheduled appointment "What can I do for you today?" the Doctor asked.
The aged gentleman replied, "Doctor, you must help me. Every time I make love...