Clean Jokes

One night, a husband and wife were having a conversation over dinner:
Wife: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
Husband: Definitely...

A man is sitting at the bar in his local tavern, furiously imbibing shots of whiskey. One of his friends happens to come into the bar and sees him...

Jayme and Bob have been back from their honeymoon for two weeks when Bob came home from work saying he'd invited four friends from the office home for dinner on Friday.
Jayme is a bit apprehensive as she asks if she must cook a meal for...

A man is out walking his dog one day when it slips the leash and runs away.
As the man is chasing him down the street, the dog runs...

A Mother-in-law decides to see if her three son-in-law's love her or at least appreciate her...
The next day while strolling along the river with her first son-in-law, she lets herself fall into the water and starts to drown...

Two mothers met for coffee one morning, and the conversation naturally turned to their kids.
'Well, Martina, how are your kids?', asks Jessica.
'To tell you the truth...

A man worked hard all day digging the garden and felt very stiff and sore.
His wife fluttered about him, pleased with the amount of work he had done and anxious to get him to do some more.
'Have a nice soak in the bath and I'll bring you a...

'So let me get this straight,' the prosecutor says to the defendant. 'You came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man.'
'That's correct,' replies...

A mild mannered man is tired of his wife always bossing him around, so he decides to go to a Psychiatrist.
The doctor gives him a booklet on assertive training. He reads it on the way home. When he...

After directory assistance gave Rosy, her boyfriend's new telephone number, she dialed him -- and got a woman.
'Is Adam there?' Rosy asked.
'He's in the shower,' she responded.
'Please tell him his girlfriend...