Time Saving Techniques
The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution: "You don`t want to try these techniques at home."
"Why not?" asked somebody from the audience.
"I watched my wife`s routine...
Butterfingers
Tired from waiting for their overdue baby, a woman and her husband broke the monotony one night with a trip to the movies. She went inside to get seats while he bought popcorn and drinks in the lobby...
Drive It Safe
A man traveling down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle covering the entire road. Looking to the side of the road, the man noticed a farmer leaning on a fence...
Having A Real Bad Day
A lady is having a bad day at the table in Monte Carlo. Down to her last Pound 100, completely exasperated, she cries, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?"
A gentleman next to her...
Bricklayer's Accident Report
Possibly the funniest story in a long while. This is a bricklayer`s accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of our Workers` Compensation board...
The Gold Watch
The judge was instructing the jury that a witness was not necessarily to be regarded as untruthful because he changed his statement from one which he had previously made to the police...
A Young Widow
To get acquainted with his new Parish, the Priest decided to call on some daily. One he selected was a young widow, her husband, according to the index card, had died two years ago. After knocking at the door, he was greeted...
The Fart List
THE CUSHIONED FART: A concealed fart, sometimes successful. The farter is usually on the fat side, sometimes a girl. They will squirm and push their butt way down into the cushions of a sofa or over-stuffed...
Not the Same Elephant
In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant...
A Tricky Question
A man is sitting on his front stoop staring morosely at the ground when his neighbor strolls over. The neighbor tries to start a conversation several times, but the older man barely responds. Finally, the neighbor...