Awfully Quiet
Santa was driving through the city and his car was weaving violently all over the road.
An cop pulls him over and asks, "Where have you been?"
"I`ve been to the pub," slurs Santa.
"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you`ve had quite a few."
"I did all right," Santa says with a smile.
"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs Santa. "For a minute there, I thought I`d gone deaf."